Posts tagged ‘Ivy Newbrush’

June 14, 2012

Hugh goes there?

by 3arn0wl

The History Department @ Poppleton High had decided to stage a re-enactment of one of the crucial moments in the English Civil War The Battle of Poppleton – the siege and subsequent taking of the Keep.

It wasn’t how the Sealed Knot would’ve done it though:

  • not because they’d ‘updated’ it to a Laser Quest;
  • nor that the re-enactment by the students of Poppleton High bore little resemblance to what had actually taken place there;
  • it was more that Ivy Newbrush had insisted that the students wear high visibility vests over their camouflage uniforms – ‘for elfin safety reasons’.

Good job there were no breeches, or there might’ve been a real revolution!

May 25, 2012

Blessed are the geeks: for they shall inherit the Earth

by 3arn0wl

Will was going to spend the day programming his new Raspberry – and when (after about a quarter of an hour) he realises he can’t do that, he’ll watch all six Star Wars films, one after another.

Justin Case’s cut some lilac to wear. He’s got a hard-boiled egg and treacle sandwiches in his packed lunch, which he’s going to eat at the cenotaph with Hugh.

ᗡႱ will be modeling his dressing gown and carrying his towel all day. He’s going to read the latest anthology of Vogon Love Poetry to JD later.

As for Ivy Newbrush, she’ll be playing Angry Birds at every opportunity.

February 24, 2012

Getting a grip

by 3arn0wl

Ivy Newbrush has had to clamp down on the activities of the Resistant Materials Department at Poppleton High.

Gerry Wainwright has been severely restricted in what she can do.

And the Carpenter’s Arms has been declared out-of-bounds to the faculty of Chorley Uni until further notice.

The purview of the Vice Squad’s reach seems to be gripping the region.

December 15, 2011


by 3arn0wl

It’s the second night of Poppleton High’s PantoCinderella, and if it’s anything like last night, Cinders will go to the ball.

But not if Ivy Newbrush and Imin Charge – the Ugly Sisters – have anything to do with it!  Oh no!  They’ve given her enough “homework” to keep her occupied ’til next Summer.

Justin Case was obviously typecast as Buttons, and despite his ungainly manner, he managed to garner the affection of the audience.

P.E. teacher, Paul King played a hapless Baron Hardup, who it seemed had a hard time keeping his lusty daughters in check.  Indeed he was powerless even to prevent Cinders going to the Ball in Vic Aler’s Coach.

At that moment,  the fire alarms went off, and it was unclear to the audience whether it was a real emergency or not, until the handsome Harry Prince burst onto the stage to ask the Ugly Sisters if they’d lost their slippers.  Of course they hadn’t!

And neither had Cinders, who was down in the kitchens enjoying a mug of hot chocolate with Buttons!

October 11, 2011

Switching energy suppliers

by 3arn0wl

Noah Wan had noticed a difference.

The new Headteacher at Poppleton High, Ivy Newbrush, thought nothing of it as she flicked the switch and the lights in her office came on.

Prue Vidor’s terribly boring end of month financial statement PowerPoint was illuminated as usual with a projector.

And Inspector Force took delivery of his electric-powered panda car.

The switchover to renewable electricity had gone incredibly smoothly.

September 6, 2011

All change here, all change.

by 3arn0wl

Somewhat uncharacteristically, Justin Case (12) had actually looked at, and considered, the new Principal’s newsletter, which had been posted through their letterbox yesterday morning.

He couldn’t understand it though.

Okay,  so that Cyborg guy at the university’s quite cool.

Their football team’s not bad. Sometimes.

And they do put some wicked bands on at their festival.

But why did she keep banging on about “The Importance of Reading”? And what had a place in Berkshire got to do with merging Poppleton’s town and school libraries?

He supposed he’d find out in the Assembly tomorrow.

August 2, 2011

Good Behaviour

by 3arn0wl

Police and clerics have expressed some concern over the morality at Poppleton High. Apparently they have been without a Principle for the last year.

Deputy Head, Imin Charge, reassured press Here that excellent behavioural standards are maintained at all times at the school. “And Social and Religious education are delivered in line with the Government’s stipulations.”

A new Headteacher Ivy Newbrush is due to take up her responsibilities in September.