Posts tagged ‘Flying Pig’

July 12, 2012

What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put a-sounder.

by 3arn0wl

Wendy and Murray are celebrating their 12th wedding anniversary.  The family have gone for meal at the Flying PigGrace is happily occupied – busily sculpting every scrap of paper she can find and continues to fold the pink napkin that Fiona places in her lap.

By the time the food arrived it was too late!  The table had been turned into a pigsty.  And Grace Merryweather had landed herself a part-time job!

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June 26, 2012

Spinning a yarn

by 3arn0wl

Eddie Lowe was in the Flying Pig last night,  volubly spinning a yarn to any and all who would listen,  about his wife spinning a yarn:

Apparently ever since the sheep have been fleecedTricia Lowe’s been spinning a yarn,  and all the time she’s been singing Schubert to herself,  spinning a yarn:

About Gretchen. Who’s been spinning her yarn,  and spinning a yarn about how her head’s been spinning ever since she met him.  And the dizzy blonde doesn’t seem to mind who knows about it!

June 24, 2012

Much Fiddling & Tossing

by 3arn0wl

Thousands, hundreds, several young people flocked to Gawthrop Farm, for the annual music festival this week.

Festival goers – dressed in dungarees, checked shirts and straw hats – went crazy when the Headline Act, The Wurzels (tribute band) sang their top ten thousand hit… You don’t get drunk: clambering at the bar for the Flying Pig’s Scrum-P.

Nick Berry proved to be a recidivist – he was seen leaving the farm after his set, with countless punnets of strawberries he’d plundered, and a very red mouth.

The planned Karaoke was transformed into a Barn Dance when an amateur group of accountants from Chorley turned up and started fiddling.

And in the quagmire that was twenny acre field, there was an unexpected outbreak of welly-tossing. Sheep were apparently stunned by the accuracy of some of the throws.

June 23, 2012

Scrum-P with Rosie

by 3arn0wl

Rub a dub dub
She sat in the pub
Enjoying Lord Rupert’s Rosé!
Tom Bell grabbed a cider,
Sidled up beside her
And frightened poor Rosie away.

June 15, 2012

Cinders May Ball

by 3arn0wl

Earlier in the week, hyperbolic paraboloids were erected on the immaculately manicured lawns of Chorley Uni for the May Ball, and last night revellers arrived, arrayed in their finery,  feasted,  and then kicked off their shoes to dance.

Undergraduate Pixie Smith effervesced, “The band were brilliant, the fireworks were fantastic, and of course, you can’t beat a glass of the Flying Pig’s sparkling perry, Maison.”

But disaster struck at midnight, as an errant firework hit the marquee and fire engulfed the big top.

Thankfully there were no fatalities, and the two sisters who underwent surgery, had planned to do so before the event – for cosmetic reasons.

“It’s a miracle that no one was hurt.” Chorley University‘s Vice-Chancellor said, “It went from a fun party to Dante’s Inferno in no time.”

Fireman Harry Prince is currently touring the area, to redistribute several pairs of shoes.

June 13, 2012

Leisure

by 3arn0wl

ᗡႱ‘s signed up for gym membership at Poppleton Leisure Centre – JD wants him to get a six-pack.

Poppy wants Andy to get a six-pack too – but he’s going to get his from the Flying Pig.

June 10, 2012

Pigs might fly

by 3arn0wl

A ǝʌıssɐɯ helium balloon served as a beacon over the tabernacle of the beer tent, attracting the Young Farmers, like moths to a flame, to Fiona’s Suffolk Punch.

Everyone had gone of course:

As always, Chorley Showground provided a vehicle to showcase all the latest farming gear for the farmers to drool over: hoes, sprayers, riddlers, ploughs and crossp dressers.

This year the show took on more of a festival atmosphere:

And at the end of the day J.W.’s bull is always best in show. …………………….